The short answer is no. Read on for the long answer.
If I could count the amount of times a woman has told me “I’d LOVE to book, but I need to lose 20 lbs first” or “let me just snap back from this pregnancy & then I’ll be ready,” I’d be counting for a lonnnnnng time. It’s the second most common excuse for not booking (the first being money- more on that here), and it’s incredible disheartnening.
As women, we’ve been programmed put our bodies in the way of our desires, consciously or subconsciously, but constantly. From two piece bathing suits to trips abroad, we always have this moving goalpost of a “better body” to keep us from doing what we really want to do. You and I are friends so I’ll give it to you straight: a better body doesn’t exist. Take it from me, I’ve photographed women who fit THE white, patriarchal standard of beauty (thin, tall, large breasts) and heard them lament over something missing or disproportionate or out of place. These body insecurities are manufactured by marketing executives to keep us buying the “cure” to our ever-evolving body woes. There’s no such thing as a body better than the one you’re living in.
And for that reason, a better body doesn’t equate to better body image. You could wake up tomorrow with a checked off laundry list of wishes for your physical form, and you would still have to make the conscious decision to meet your body with as much love & loyalty as it affords you. Even if you’ve resolved to make peace with your body in the form of diet, exercise or weight loss, the decision to love your body precedes physical changes, not the other way around. I have friends & clients alike who exist squarely outside of the patriarchal formula of beauty, and are grounded in love & reverence for their bodies, because they made the decision to be.
While I truly admire & appreciate all of the iterations of the female form, it’s the least interesting part of a woman. While a boudoir session allows you to truly see & celebrate the beauty of your body from the same outside perspective with which you view another woman on instagram, it’s about so much more than that. We celebrate the bravery that was required for you to fill out a contact form, go through the planning process & actually show up. We celebrate the stories that maybe don’t make their way to your social media feeds: the story of beating an eating disorder, the story of healing after heartbreak, the story of being a self made woman. Again: your body is the least interesting thing about you, and it’s celebrated first as a vessel for the textured narrative of your life.
Our bodies change on the daily, and it’s yet another unrealistic expectation for women to wake up every day feeling ecstatic about the way we look. Each of my clients receives a pre-session questionnaire, and one of the questions is “are there any parts of your body you’d prefer to NOT be highlighted in your images?” I take the answers on your questionnaire very seriously, and will be using specific posing techniques through the majority of the session to honor any requests you make. That said, if I see an opportunity to create a beautiful image that shows off a body part of concern (soft tummies are a common one), I’m taking it. The payoff of leaning into a bit of discomfort is an image that reframes some harsh feelings and reminds you that every inch of your body is good & worthy & beautiful.
My clients all receive an exhaustive preparation guide, walking you through how to choose outfits based on the parts of your body you DO want to show off. Ultimately, any lingerie that makes you feel good is a winner in my book, but here are some of my favorite tried & true brands. All of these brands offer styles in at least a 2x